How to become an abstract artist in 1 hour / 如何在一小時內成為抽象藝術家

現今似乎人人都能當個藝術家，只是看你有沒有錢有沒有名罷了；
In nowadays, it seems everyone can be an artist, only depends on how much money you have and how famous you are.


每個人都有夢，有夢最美。(靈感無價)
Everyone has dreams, which is beautiful. (inspiration is PRICELESS)


但有些東西沒有天份也是沒有用的。
But somethings don't work if you don't have real TALENT.


不過還是可以來畫畫。
Nevertheless, you can still draw.


今天要來敎大家究竟要如何在一小時內畫出一幅抽象畫，讓你自我感覺良好，還有讓別人以為你是很有深度的，充分表達內心感觸。但其實只是在塗鴉亂畫。
Today I'm going to teach you how to paint abstract painting in an hour, you will feel good about yourself, and let others think you are a deep thought person, expressing the inner feelings. But actually it's just plain doodle.

《EASY STEPS TO BECOME PICASSO WANNABE》

Step 1: Get a piece of paper / 一張紙

在此我選擇使用一般4開水彩紙，用什麼紙隨你開心就好，你要用報紙也可以。

Here I have used a common 4K drawing paper, it doesn't matter what paper or canvas you choose, as long as you are happy.

Step 2: Draw dots randomly with passion / 充滿熱情的在紙上畫點點

如圖，你就想在哪邊畫點點就戳下去吧。在此我使用一般廉價水蠟筆。

As shown, just draw the dots where ever you want. Here I used cheap water crayons. 

Step 3: Connect the dots / 把點點連起來

隨意的將點點都連起來，想怎麼連都可以。

Connect the dots which ever way you want.

Step 4: Fill in with colors / 著色

在這邊選色其實有點小重要，你顏色用不對了整張圖就會怪。建議使用較基本的顏色再加一點紅色去點綴。

Color choices is a very important part, if you use the wrong color it'll ruin the whole painting. Suggest using the basic colors and add some red into it to make it pop.

Step 5: You're half done, now observe / 你快畫完了，現在觀察一下

稍微把眼睛瞇起來就有如真正的畫家般，或是站遠一點看一下這幅畫哪裡需要再加些什麼。

Close your eyes a bit to look at it just like a real artist, or stand further to look at it and see where you need to fix or add.

Step 6:  Outline it / 畫框

拿些水性顏料 (壓力克顏料、廣告顏料...等)，為色格加上一框，感覺比較有活力點。(應該吧?)

Use some water colors and outline the line underneath, it makes it feel more.... energetic. (I suppose)

Step: Add finish touch / 加上最終筆觸 

這一部分也是非常重要的一部分，能不能成功矇騙大家這是幅有深度的畫就靠這個關鍵了。這部份大家可自行發揮，由於我今天比較焦慮不開心，所以我就加上了點感覺不太開心內心複雜在哭泣的感覺。(是嗎)

This part is very important too, it's the main point to cheat others that this is a very deep painting. You can do whatever you want here, as for me, I am anxious and unhappy today, so I added some touches feeling sad and complicated inside, like it's crying. (right?)

《AND YOU'RE DONE》

And that was easy!

hi BANGCOCK, we meet again / 嗨曼谷，我們又相見了

(Yes, I know I spelled Bangkok wrong, I did it on purpose)

The fact that I've been to Thailand too many times, I should have lose my passion for it,  I am Grace after all.
But I have not, I actually find every trip to Thailand different, and makes me discover more things every time, good and bad. And the place still inspires me very much.
我已經去了泰國太多次了，由於我是貴死，應該多多少少會失去對它的熱情。但居然沒有，而且還發現每趟去泰國的體驗都是不太一樣的，而且會發現更多東西，好的壞的都有。還有泰國還是讓我找到許多靈感。


Good discovers/好的發現:

1. I am well-aware of the insane traffic jams in Bangkok, do not drive or take a taxi during rush hours, and there are many rush hours in Bangkok: 6-9 take kids to school, go to work time, 11-1lunch time, 5-10 off work off school time. Which means traffic jam all the time, except for pass midnight.Walking is a very good and healthy option when you go some where not too far away. / 我已經很清楚泰國那噁心的車潮了，在尖峰時間請不要坐計程車或者開車，在曼谷的尖峰時間很多: 6-9 帶小孩上課上班時間，11-1 午餐休息時間，5-10 下班下課時間。 代表曼谷無時無刻都在塞車，除了過了午夜。 去不遠的地方的話，用走路的其實是個相當不錯而且健康的選擇。
2. I can now shop wisely without being robbed and getting ripped off  because I'm too innocent and kind. / 我現在終於可以聰明的購物，不再害怕被騙錢因為我人太好了，畢竟我也被騙過很多次了。 
3. Platinum- a shopping center with air-conditioning, and good cheap nice looking clothes and shoes, you don't really have to ask for a bargain or worry that you might get ripped off. First piece is the regular price, you have to buy 2+pieces to get wholesale price. And if you ask directions or take the taxi there, and you do not speak Thai, remember, PLATINUM there is pronounced "PRA-TOO-NUM" / Platinum (水門市場)，是個非常好購物、有冷氣、交通也很方便、衣服鞋子便宜又好看的購物商場，你在那邊其實不太用害怕被騙錢，他價錢其實都是固定的，第一件通常都是零售價，不會讓你打折，你要買兩件以上他就會給你批發價(但其實單件的價格也很便宜了)。 還有，若你要問路人或者做計程車去那邊的話，然後你不會說泰文，請記得，他們PLATINUM發音並不是正確的英文發音，發音是"普拉、兔、ㄋㄤˋ"。
4. Always wear flops when you go to Thailand. / 去泰國請一定要穿一雙夾腳拖鞋。

Bad discovers / 不好的發現:

1. The food is still very hot, sour , and way too sweet for my flavor. / 食物對我的口味來說還是很辣、很酸、過甜。
2. The taxi driver will still cheat on you, not using the meter to charge, always take a taxi that uses the meter. / 計程車司機依舊會騙你的錢，不用跳錶的方式，用喊價的，記得永遠都要坐按跳錶的計程車，事實上在曼谷市區，若沒有瘋狂塞車，價錢超過200是天價了。

And for the things I've learned. / 還有些我學習到的事情:

- When you decide to torture your stomach and challenge street foods, do realize about 85.8% of the street vendors are not fully educated, although English is an international language, you might assume they should know some easy words, such as: ice, hot, shrimp, pineapple, watermelon....etc, but a lot of them still don't know, it's actually good enough if they know "how much, thank you , one, two...etc". Some area's street vendor's English is better, but the food and price are made for tourists. So if you go to some really Thai place, please don't humiliate them by saying too much English, just simple point out what you want. / 當你決定想要虐待你的腸胃，挑戰看看路邊攤食物，請知道大約85.8%的攤販們，其實並非受到良好的教育，雖然英文是國際語言，你假設他們一定會知道一些簡單的單字，例如:冰、熱、蝦子、鳳梨、西瓜...等，但其實事實是他們其實很多都聽不懂，他們如果聽的懂"多少錢、謝謝、一、二"就已經很不錯了。 有些地區的攤販英文會好許多，但價錢以及口味都是為"觀光客"研發的(表示價格昂貴些許，口味比較不道地)。所以如果你要去些比較深入泰國的地方吃些道地的食物，請別再羞辱他們講一大串英文了，簡單的用手指你要的就可以了。

- Iced coffee in Thai is pronounced "COFFEE YEN". (I've learned that because I got sick of drinking coke and the 97%sugar thai milk tea. Oh, and the taste-like-when-I-sing-in-the-shower-accidentally-drank-bath-water- bottled water). And the street iced-coffee is actually not bad! considering it's only like 15-30 baht per cup, only if you're not afraid of getting diarrhea, it isn't very sanitary. Someone did said something about drinking iced-coffee pass noon is wrong, I am sorry, I just can't take it anymore, the drink there is just not right. / 冰咖啡在那邊的發音是"咖啡，煙" (我學到這個因為我受夠了喝可樂還有大約有97%都是糖的泰式奶茶。喔，還有那個喝起來像我在洗澡唱歌時不小心喝下去的洗澡水礦泉水) 還有其實路邊攤賣的冰咖啡不錯，而且一杯只要15-30泰銖，如果你不怕拉肚子的話啦，是真的不是最衛生的食物，但試試也無訪。有個人曾跟我提過過中午後喝冰咖啡是不對的，但對不起，我實在受不了那邊的飲料了。

-Street artist are still brilliant and great  / 街頭藝人仍然很棒。

I am the type of person that appreciate all kinds of art, street art the most, it's more real and it's beautiful.

我欣賞各式各樣的藝術，最欣賞的就是街頭藝術，最底層的藝術，更真實更美麗。

However, one day in my Bangkok trip, I decided to go study their 7-11, and I discovered these;

有天在我的曼谷行，我決定要去研究它的7-11，這些是我的發現；

(ok, fuck blogger!!!!!! I can't get the pictures where I want it to be!!!!! fuck it!!!!!!!!)

Thai comic books, 5 baht per book, and this is something I'm trying really hard to appreciate it's beauty, I'm still trying.

泰國漫畫書，一本只要五泰銖，這是我很努力在學著去欣賞的，我還在努力中。

And as for my study in TESCO, I've discover they've got "URINE BAGS" for sale, 160 baht.

然後我在特易購的時候，我發現他們居然有販購"便利尿袋"，一包160泰銖。

Seriously!!!!!!

And we shall meet again Bangcock, but not yet...not...yet......

to Allen

Although life may be black and white,
雖然人生是黑白的，

But with the passion we still have,
但用著我們仍有的熱情，

We can still make the world colorful.
我們還是能夠讓世界多采多姿。








Happy Birthday my friend, although I'm one fucking month late.
But I know you'll understand,I know you loooooooove me :)