姊弟的對話 episode 1

故事是這樣的 (我跟我哥感情也很好只是我這篇先寫我弟可以嗎)：

     我弟小我七歲，英文名為Michael，後來被我叫成米糕，米糕之後又被我延伸叫成A Ko(阿扣)。基本上我弟自從出生一直處於被我霸凌虐待的狀態 (喔不，我其實超照顧他超疼他的)。

    他被取名叫Michael這也是有故事的；我的老爹叫Jack，當時生哥哥的時候他就說那哥哥叫 Jackson (Jack + son)。取我的名字無邏輯就因為我很優雅所以我叫Grace。結果蹦出一個弟弟我爸就想到: "我很喜歡Michael Jackson，那弟弟就叫Michael 好了"。 恩，真的，不要以為我那麼奇怪不是沒有被遺傳到的。

     弟弟與我感情就有如兄弟(兄弟無誤)，畢竟我不想把我弟帶長大成為娘娘腔，我私心想要他很MAN可以把你舉起來摔下去舉起來摔下去那種，所以我對他都是愛的教育鐵的紀律也從不會叫他陪我做些很女性化的事情 (這我也是開玩笑的，沒有所謂鐵的紀律而言) 從小我們就一起打電動放煙火摔角欺負弱小看殭屍電影看影集看權力遊戲看浴血戰士還有打打殺殺的噁心片的，生活快樂無比。

     我弟就是從小被無理又神經病的姊姊虐待，不時會叫他幫我買吃的買夜用型衛生棉，把他電腦用到中毒然後裝死 ( 很久以前我弟跟我說我的硬碟中毒了不要亂插，事過了幾年後好傻好天真的姊姊以為那硬碟裡面的毒都過了那麼久應該消毒了，於是又插到我弟的電腦上，我弟就爆了)。

    還記得某年我在拔腋毛的時候，弟弟貼心的看到我拔到眼睛都快脫窗了，他就說他可以幫我拔，結果他拔到我腋下皮都被扒掉了，都流血了。但我沒有因此生氣我們反而是笑了一頓，不過我從此再也不給他拔了。

     也因為姊姊個性詭異帶出一個個性淡定的弟弟，有什麼事情他還會覺得更奇怪的嗎。

     某天我弟想跟我分享他現在在打工店裡的員工照片，後來看了一下對話也覺得他真的脾氣有夠好的，對話如下：

Ako: 你看我們員工照，帥吧

Ako:

弟弟打工地方的員工照(弟弟為右一)

Ako: 我手臂好壯欸，看的出來嗎

Grace: 

Ako: 去死吧

Grace: 

Ako: 白癡喔

Grace: 

Ako: 你是不是很悠哉

Ako: 你看台北店

Ako:

Grace: 

Grace: Jon Snow

Grace: 

Grace: 戶愚呂兄弟

Ako: 吃飽太閒欸

就是一個完全沒在聽他講話的姊姊

【終】
(也許可以期待續集)

     

Friday-Sunday, July 27~29, 2012

     As I've been cleaning and moving like hell for the past few weeks, there are always something that slows me down, and it wasn't the heavy duty lifting part, it was the part where I've found out that there were some memories I've actually kept and have forgotten about.

    Nearly 4 years ago, this was taken (borrowed) and thrown in the trunk of my car. And we've forgotten about that too,

     And four years later I found it, newspaper has already turned yellow, but it just somehow looked so new.

     It was still good.

:-)

The Costco Refugee Camp (Oh no wait, it's just free sample) / 好市多難民營 (喔不，只是免費試吃區)

I am too ashamed to say anything, I tried to look at it in a funny way, or a different culture's  phenomenon. Oh no wait again, I live here.

Are you seriously that hungry.

我真的已經覺得太丟臉我並不想要再多講甚麼了，我試著以好笑的角度去看，或者是一個不同文化的現象去看。喔再次的不，我住在這耶。

你們真的有那麼餓嗎?

當然也別忘記打包酸菜及碎洋蔥的人們了。

Bruce the goose who had a pair of shoes ft. the abandoned shoes

This is Bruce, the goose, who had a perfect pair of fitting shoes.

     Bruce specifically like this pair of shoes. He climbs the mountain with them, he went to the marathon with them, he travels with them, he goes dancing with them, he goes to fashion shows with them, he goes to dinner with them, he goes to gym with them. He literally goes everywhere with this pair of shoes. Everywhere, together all the time. Never wanted to change that perfect fitting pair of shoes.

     One day Bruce went on a long trip, Bruce walked too much and got a huge sore on his foot. He felt so weird because the pair of shoes were always fitting and so comfortable, why would it hurt and make him sore? But he didn't bother to take the shoe off and check what was wrong.

     He ignored the pain and continued to walk, Bruce even started to run, he thought if he ran fast enough he will forget the pain. But soon after Bruce's pain on his foot grew to both of his feet, and his legs, his ankle, his calf, his knee, his thigh, and then deep into his muscles.

     Bruce was so furious because he was in so much pain, feeling that the shoes does not fit anymore, it was all the shoes fault that he cannot walk any further.

    He took them off and threw them away on the road.

    Bruce went to buy a new pair of shoes. As he took his socks off...

     "Ooooohhhh...." Bruce said, "I've got a fucking bug bite on my foot that is why my foot hurts and my whole body hurts now. "FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!"

    And so Bruce lost his shoes. He can't find it back. He lost it.

But he still has a pair of socks. Like Chuck the Duck.

       

Why would you throw your fitting shoes away? Why there?

Why there? 

my fear of liquid dripping on my head

      I remember when I was little, around 6 or 7, I would look at the bird feces that are on car windows, park benches, statues, street lamps or where ever, and I would ask my older brother what are the chances of it dripping on my head or shoulder. As he was my older brother, he calmed me down by telling me that I'm a moving object, so it's really unlikely to have it on me, expect if I don't move. Yes, again as my older brother he will tease me and I'll actually believe it. So that theory made me a hyperactive kid for at least 5 years (well, when I was outdoor). Everyone would ask me why am I so scared of standing still when I'm outdoor, or why am I always looking at the sky. My explanation at that time is I am happy to be under the sun and I like I like to look at the sky. God knows it's actually quite poetic what I've answered before.

     As I age, I realize bird feces will drop on you no matter I move or not. But yes, chances are lower if I move. Which sounds like a quote now, "If you move often, you won't have shit on you" - G.Lee

     Believe it or not, I'm still afraid of it, it has traumatized me since childhood. I had a dream (or to say, nightmare) once. Was about all the possible liquids that might drop on my head, and I won't want to know what it is, so I will never raise my head up again.

    The worst part of that dream was someone was peeing on the balcony, and I just happened to walk by. Then it was someone jerking off on the balcony...spilling acid...drunk and throwing up....you get the idea. Speaking of drunk and throwing up on the balcony, it's not fiction. I got traumatized again while I was in London.

     Mr.Peter Man(sorry to mention your whole name, haha) was the host of this amazing house party, as I was so fresh in London, I would literally take pictures of whatever I thought was funny and interesting. So did this:" IF YOU'RE GOING TO THROW UP DO IT OVER THE BALCONY ONTO THE STREET". That is how I got traumatized again.

And this is what happened after 3 hours.

This is not relevant, but I just had to share it. I laughed so deeply when I saw the "three seashells". GO TACO BELL!

And that is my story of my fear. Life is short. You never know what will drop on your head.

Yeah I always end of irrelevant, get used to it. fin

United Nation of Dreams, The Cloud

Inspired by Matt Blease

     It has been another one of those weeks, and me trying to balance everything so I wouldn't go mad...work, exercise, yoga, drink with friends, try to party a bit, play with my dog, watch some movies, read some books, do some studies, draw something...chat with an old friend, meet some new friends, spend some quality time with my family, get a spa...do a massage... try to actually write a blog a week.What does it take for one to accomplish all that within one week time?  And I'm for sure not the busiest person at this age. WHAT THE HELL.

Well...I'm still very positive on this thought...as one of my favorite quote from Einstein; 

"Life is like riding a bicycle, to keep balance, you must keep moving."

     As I'm trying to list out and draw down my conclusions on this week...I've realized how important my google drive and iCloud are, and how too many social platforms can be very controlling and misleading what is most important in our lives now. Well, I knew that already, it is just very tempting and hard to resist, I need to remind myself time to time....

    Dreamer these days can make their dreams come true via the internet and all those social platforms, all they need is the likes, loves and a touch of the ego balloon. Self-confidence, self-esteem + ego and popularity and there you have it.

    Not saying anything bad at  dreamers, I consider myself sometimes a dreamer as well, life would be so boring without dreaming. I'm just saying I'm cynical and I felt like complaining a bit on this beautiful Sunday afternoon, and on this dreamers-to-be-blogspot.

     I wish there are 2 Sundays in a week sometimes...So  someone can talk to me about books I would like, some movies I should watch, what music would make me fall in love, what funny blog I'd like to share...send me pictures that you know I'll appreciate, and what comic book you know I will like,but it's in Italian, there's also a French version, but you would say you'd never forgive me if I read the French version :-P. Ask me what is my logic for some serious things, ask me about my day, my week, my dog, my work. All we've ever needed was this cloud, a cloud where we can keep some soul. 

I've found the English version now, all is fair.

"Inspire me while I'm with myself"

how to feel a female's period cramp / 如何感受女性經痛的痛苦

     I sincerely appreciate those who would say something sweet as "I hope I can share some of your pain", "I wish I can feel your pain" words during the worst times of my period cycle.
    But honestly I can't describe how much it really hurts to a male. Therefore I think this is the best way you'll know.

    I just had to.

   我誠心的感激那些在我經痛最慘的時候聽到那些跟我說"我希望我能分享一些妳的痛苦"、"我希望我能感受妳的痛苦"等等安慰字句。
     但我認真的不覺得男性真的能夠了解經痛到底有多痛。所以我想這是最好讓你們體會的方式了。

Inspired by:

unhinged / 精神失常

unhinged

      adj 1: affected with madness or insanity; "a man who had gone

             mad" [syn: {brainsick}, {crazy}, {demented}, {disturbed},

             {mad}, {sick}, {unbalanced}, {unhinged}]

“Once you’ve accepted your flaws, no one
can use them against you.” 

Tyrion Lannister 

― George R.R. Martin, A Game of Thrones
"一旦你接受了你的缺點，沒有人可以使用它們對你。"

ciao Italia, truly the chicken soup for my soul / 義大利,真正的心靈雞湯

FCO - BLQ - VCE - MXP

"Nice Hat" - Città del Vaticano

     I've been almost one year late on this one, no surprise again for my procrastination, but I've see my habits are if I finish one blog, suppose I will try to finish one or two more.

     Italy was always one of the dreamy places I wanted to go, the pizza...pasta....vespa...Italian guys of course, the fashion...the shoes...leather......wine....the beautiful vineyards...it can go on. I've to say it did not disappoint me, even the tourist traps was very funny.

    已經過了將近一年我才又開始想把這篇完成，不要太驚訝我有多會拖，但我也了解我自己的習性了，通常我只要寫完一篇我就會努力的再拼個一兩篇出來。

     義大利一直以來都是我覺得很夢幻的地方，披薩....義大利麵....偉士牌機車....義大利男人這就不用多說了、時尚、鞋子....皮革.....紅酒....美麗的葡萄園....我可以講很久。我得說完全沒有令我失望，即使是很觀光客陷阱的地方。

(抱歉，下面的文字幾乎都沒中文，一方面我懶，另一方面是我只有放照片，請各位看不懂英文的見諒，然後我建議你真的去學一下英文好了) 

(我壞壞)

"Follow the DREAM" - Sirmione, Lago Di Garda 西米歐尼

"跟隨你的夢" 

"The Start, The Freshness, The Excitement"

The Toilet

This is what most Asian who has not traveled to Europe before will be very confused of (I'm happy I know it long ago, thanks to my Wai Guo Ren ex-boyfriend). "Is that for washing my face?", no it is not, it's for washing your ass.

這是沒去過歐洲的亞洲人看到會很困惑的。(我很高興我很久以前就知道了，感謝我的歪國人前男友) "這是拿來洗臉的嗎?"，不，是拿來洗屁股的。

"Dog Parking" - Roma 羅馬

"狗停車場"

One of those tourist traps. Penis pasta

其中一個觀光客陷阱，"老二義大利麵" (好啦我自己也有買)

Guy eating a 2 Euro Watermelon

This one mainly is because the watermelon is very cheap in Taiwan, and this guy ordered a 2 Euro watermelon and eating with knife and fork. I suppose I feel how foreigners see us queuing for Krispy Kreme now. 

這張主要是我們身在台灣，西瓜是很便宜的，這西瓜這樣一盤在那賣價2歐元(將近80臺幣)然後他還用刀叉吃讓我覺得挺奇妙的。這就很像外國人看我們在排隊買Krispy Kreme一樣神奇了吧。

Italian Slurpee

I just like this, what.

"The Signs"

So creative

That's a penis sign in case you can't tell, was in Pompeii, the old brothel.

那是根老二指標如果你看不清楚的話，在龐貝，妓院。

And that is a penis too.

這也是根老二沒錯。

How would you like it?

"The Laundry"

The Laundries series.

Maybe it's because in Taiwan there's always a balcony or the rooftop to dry your clothes, or maybe it's because our building (sorry to say, quite ugly) so when we dry our clothes it doesn't really have this weird look to it. But here the building are so old and so artsy when they dry their clothes like this...it always catches my eyes.
也許是台灣都有個頂樓/陽台可以晾衣服，也有可能是我們的建築物(醜)晾起來沒有什麼違和感，但在這裡的建築物都是將進上百年的古蹟，晾起現代的衣服有種特別的感覺.....總是很吸引我。

Cinque Terre 五漁村

Venezia 威尼斯

I just love the background of where they dry their laundries.

我就是很喜歡他們晾衣服的背景....